A Weight Loss Journey

Weight loss.  Most of us have struggled with it in some capacity or another.  I'd like to blame my weight gain on giving birth to two babies, but in reality it's mostly poor eating habits and lack of exercise.  

When my second and last child was 5 weeks old I decided to lose weight.  Fast forward 6 months later and I can declare that I've lost a solid 20 pounds.  It might not seem like much, but considering I was almost 75 pounds overweight, I think it's a great accomplishment.  I didn't JUST lose 20 pounds during the past 6 months, I accomplish other important things as well.  20 pounds was just the icing on top of the cake--poor choice of words, perhaps?  Here's what I've learned over the past 6 months:

1.  You can only lose weight for yourself.

I started losing weight for my daughters.  I don't want them to witness my poor eating habits and unhealthy lifestyle.  I don't want them to ever say "mom's dieting again" and make them believe that they too need to "diet".  I don't want my insecurities and poor self-image to ever "rub off" on my daughters.  

I started losing weight for my husband.  He didn't marry a Fatty McFatterton, so it's only fair that I take care of myself.  Let's be honest, I let myself go.  It's easy to do.  I stopped exercising, made poor food choices, and just stopped taking the time to care for myself. 

I didn't start losing weight until I started losing weight for myself.  Bingo!  Even when I began this weightless journey, I still wasn't doing it for ME!  But as the weeks past and my body was sore from workouts, only I noticed the changes.  My girls and husband knew I was exercising and watching my diet, but life went on as usual for them.  

But life wasn't the same for me.  I was making the sacrifices.  I was waking up early to workout before the girls woke up, I was the one exercising when the girls went to bed, I was the one learning how to incorporate green vegetables into meals, and I was the one walking with a limp because my body hadn't exercised in years.  It was me.  Not my girls.  Not my husband.  Me.

Lose weight for yourself because damn it, you and I are worth it.  Let's take the time to take care of ourselves.  

2. Your body will hurt.

I'm 35 years old.  I'm not a young pup.  I began slowly exercising 5 weeks after my daughter was born via scheduled c-section.  (My first daughter was an emergency c-section, so my doctor advised me to do another c-section with my second daughter).  I slowly started walking on my treadmill.  I did it when my girls were sleeping.  I wanted to be sleeping too, so I sacrificed what little sleep I had for even less sleep.  

As I slowly plugged along on the treadmill, I noticed walking started giving me more energy.  For me it takes about 20 minutes into the workout for my body to start "waking up".  If I can make it past 20 minutes, then I'm pretty certain I can keep going.

For the first three months I was only able to walk 2.2 - 2.6 miles per hour--which isn't very much if you're familiar with treadmills.  But I was doing it.  It was better than doing nothing!

I'd push myself.  What this means is if I told myself I'll only walk 20 minutes and stop, I forced myself to walk 25 minutes.  The extra 5 minutes doesn't seem like a lot, but everything helps when you're not used to exercising!

Let me say it again--I PUSH myself because it HURTS.  My muscles are sore.  My body doesn't understand why it's not relaxing on the couch like it has been for the past 7 years.  I don't hurt everyday, but some days a ligament in my left leg will be lightly strained or a heel or my shins will be sore.  My body will have discomfort, but I'm not injured.  You should be able to recognize the difference between discomfort that will work itself out after a 15 minute warmup or an injury that simply needs to be rested for a few days.  


6 months later and I'm able to walk/job intermittently for 2 miles which, for me, takes about 40 minutes fast walking at 3.0 miles per hour and jogging at about 3.2 miles per hour.  Again, it's not the best, but it's better than nothing!  I also like to try to go the "extra mile" literally!  I like to try to walk an extra mile so my treadmill workout lasts about an hour. 

No pain, no gain.  It sucks, but it's true.    


3.  If you really want to lose weight, you will find the time to exercise. 

After my first daughter, I failed at losing weight because I used her as an excuse.  I'm taking care of a baby, I don't have time to exercise!  

Oddly enough, now I have two daughters--a baby and a pre-schooler--and all of the sudden I can find time to exercise.  Weird how that happens, huh?

As I said before, I'll exercise when they are both asleep either early in the morning or late at night--with the baby monitor right next to me.  I'll exercise during the day while the baby is taking a nap and the pre-schooler is watching TV or playing dolls in her room.  I'll exercise while the pre-schooler is sleeping in and the baby is playing in her bouncy chair or saucer.  I'll exercise while the girls are hanging out with their daddy for an hour.  I'll take the baby on an early morning walk while the pre-schooler and my husband sleep in on the weekends.  I'll take the baby for a walk while the pre-schooler is at pre-school two afternoons a week.

The point is, if you want to exercise, you will find time.

My workouts are always interrupted   Always.  I'm constantly jumping off the treadmill for a few minutes to peek on my older kid or to retrieve a toy for the baby.  I might have to stop and feed either kid or hold the baby for a few minutes to comfort her about something.  But I keep going.  And both girls started to fall into a routine.  My pre-schooler knew mommy was exercising and she'd have to wait for a bit before I could look at her newest block creation and the baby started to entertain herself more and sometimes just watch me as I plugged away on the treadmill.  In fact, the baby became my workout buddy and would often fall asleep in her rock 'n play cradle as she munched on her fingers or a toy. 

I want to sleep, but I want to lose weight more.  I want to snuggle with my husband on the couch after the girls are in bed, but I want to lose weight more.  I want that chocolate chip cookie, but I want to wear a swimsuit more.

If you want to lose weight, you will find time to exercise.  You will also allow your body time to build endurance and to get stronger.  An extra 5 minutes here or an extra mile there--it all adds up to a fitter and stronger you.

4. Take responsibility for what you put in your mouth.

I get so mad when I don't see immediate results.  I need to learn how to be more patient.  It took years to put this weight on and I'll be damned if it takes years to get it off!  Oh hell no!  The quickest way to get results is the watch what you eat.  We all know what food is "good or bad" and if you don't, make an appointment with a nutritionalist.  You won't lose weight eating delicious warm rolls or chocolate pudding pie.  You will lose weight if you eat steamed veggies and lean meats.  I'd rather eat the bad foods, but oddly enough, the more I eat the good foods, the less I want the bad foods.  Even more strange, Halloween is in a few weeks so I bought a bag of candy.  I treated myself to a bite-sized Twix candy bar and guess what?  It was gross!  The chocolate tasted chalky.  It didn't hit the orgasmic spot like food used to do in the past.  Holy cow, your tastebuds actually do change! I'm still not going to eat Tofu or cut out all sweets, but I do make a conscious effort to eat smaller portions and I've come to realize the first bite of any "junk" food is the best--one bite for me and that's all I need.  But that's just me--now.  I wasn't always like this.  A month into this journey my mother-in-law made sugar cookies for Easter and I probably ate most of them!  Damn they were good!  But I know for a fact if she made those same cookies for Halloween, I'd be satisfied with just one cookie.  Okay maybe two.  Wait.  She better not make them at all!  No one's perfect!!  

Recognize your weaknesses and no one is shoving food down your throat.  Take responsibility for what you put in your mouth. 

And this now leads me into the last thing I've learned so far, 6 months into this weight loss journey. 

5. Patience.

I don't have any.  I have zero patience.  Not just in weight loss, but in everything.  I get annoyed when the microwave is too slow.  I fast forward to the end or Google the winner of a competition show.   Having to wait almost 10 months to meet my two daughters while they were growing inside of me was grueling.  

Weight loss is a bastard.  I can't suck the fat out like wealthy people so I have to do it the old fashioned way--good 'ol diet and exercise. And that my friends, takes lots and lots of time and PATIENCE.

But there is ONE saying that gets me past my impatience.  The quote is something about how in one year from today, if you keep exercising and making healthy food choices, you will lose weight.  But if you quit, how will you look and feel in a year from now?  

Don't quit.  Be patient--even if you have no patience like me.  Time passes regardless.  Where do you want to be in one year from now?  Fatter or thinner?  

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So these are the five things I've learned over the past 6 months.  I've only lost 20 pounds, but I've gained a lot of knowledge. 

It was important for me to write this out because last week I broke my toe.  It was late at night and I was headed to bed.  I went to the backdoor to make sure it was locked and as I was headed for the stairs to go to bed, my right foot tripped over my baby's bouncy chair.  And now I have a broken toe.  It's hard to walk, let alone exercise.  

I'm mad because I was just gaining enough endurance to maintain a jog for more than five minutes.  Again to those that run everyday, it might not seem like a lot to you, but for me, a person that has been out of shape for years, it's a huge accomplishment. 

I don't want to lose that endurance.  I've hosted a few pity parties in my honor and I am starting to acquire a taste for Twix.  I need to remind myself how far I've come and to not slip back into old habits.  I might not be able to exercise, but I can stop putting junk food in my mouth!

Maybe this is just another lesson in patience?

In one year from now, I'm not going to look back on this moment and say "that's when I stopped my weight loss journey" ... instead I want this moment to be only a bump in my weight loss journey.

Only time will tell ...    

Welcome to Trophy Wife Gone Wrong Blog

Tro-phy Wife: an attractive young wife that is viewed as a status symbol for an old man

Tro-phy Wife Gone Wrong: an older wife that can't fit into her wedding dress, wears sweatpants with baby spit stains, and only plucks her eyebrows on special occasions.

Okay! I'm not exactly a Trophy Wife and I certainly hope I'm not a Trophy Wife Gone Wrong!  I'm just a woman trying to balance marriage, motherhood, and a career.  Most importantly, I'm a writer.  This blog is a creative outlet while my life is filled with dirty diapers and dirty dishes.  Sound a little familiar? If it does, then you'll probably get a chuckle or two as you join me on this new journey into the mind of a Trophy Wife Gone Wrong.

A little disclaimer:

Writers write what they know, but they also like to embellish, pretend they know more than they really do, or just sometimes outright lie if it can make a great story.  This blog is a creative outlet but not necessarily a mirror image of my personal life.  Please enjoy and remember it's ultimately for entertainment purposes only.  Cheers!